Guardians of the Galaxy: Overall, it sucked

I went to see this movie with moderately high hopes after the trailers and the amazing soundtrack. I even avoided social media the week the movie premiered so that nothing would spoil it for me. Boy, was I disappointed. And not just any disappointed, Thor The Dark World disappointed. This movie has two major things pulling it down: very very very bad writing and Gamorra. Yes, the humor was great. It was funny, and the visuals were mind blowing, but I can just as well watch Game of  Thrones for all that.

So, James Gunn both wrote and directed the movie, I enjoyed some of his other movies. At this time, I'm not sure I want to see a sequel, but don't let him write it. I don't care if he directs it, the movie looked great but there is no way to get around the bad writing. So get someone else to do that. I started reading the comics a year before the movie came out, and if I didn't, I wouldn't have known what the hell was going on half the time. The story just didn't flow well and the movie didn't seem like essential viewing for the MCU, and that is actually important to me. I don't get the appeal of Marvel's cosmic properties and gave up on Thor a long time ago, and this didn't pull me back in.

Gamorra.... Sigh... To be fair, it's not all Zoe Saldana's fault. Marvel doesn't seem to understand how to do a strong female character as they've wasted Betty Ross, Maria Hill, Victoria Hand and Natasha Romanoff so far to name a few. Zoe Saldana herself seems to have a basic template for playing a lady in space, as this was just a green version of her characters in Avatar and Star Trek. Did anyone give her a comic before the movie to show her what Gamorra's all about? She's supposed to be an assasin and one of the deadliest women in the universe... Nope, didn't get that at all and she actually needed to be saved a lot more than I expected. The flirtation scene was also out of character, but they did that to Black Widow too in Winter Soldier, so maybe they need a female writer/director for those parts... I know there's internet buzz on if Gamorra needs to be recast - at this point I think it might actually hurt Marvel more, so they need to flesh out and advance the character instead. And give miss Saldana access to the comic archives - she needs it.

As far as characters go, this movie has too many. By the time Avengers Assemble rolled around, there had been four or five individual movies establishing the characters and their abilities. This time, everyone had to be explained in two hours. This wasn't a good idea and, again, if I hadn't read the comics I wouldn't know what half the people were there for. Also, a lot of people died for a PG-10 movie.

The leader of the gang and the reason we are supposed to want to see the movie, Peter Quill, was forgettable & so all over the place I didn't know what to make of him. The hospital bit was good, but his mom calling him Star Lord wasn't revealed untill the end of the movie. Yes, I do like his childlike behavior and cheesy references, but it's not enough to hook me. He needs a standalone film to delve into his character more. His time on Earth, his time with Yondu, etc. A sequel to search for his father? No, you'll need Nova and Miss Marvel for that. Rocket showed more leader instincts than this guy did, so you need to establish that.

Batista sucked, no other way to put it. I like him as a wrestler, but dude you can't act. Big strong guy covered in T.A.H.I.T.I. tattoos, and Ronan makes him feel bad and beats him up. He gets saved by a tree... Oscar people, take note. Ronan and the Accusers looked amazing by the way. Ronan was 100% batsh*t crazy and I believed it. Let me go on record here that I will watch a movie filled with the Kree. And if it's not clear yet, I don't like the space based movies. The Kree were amazing, but there was not enough time everyone in this film. I don't remember if he dies at the end (I'm not seeing it a third time unless it's on TV) but Ronan is actually one of the better characters in the comics.

There was absolutely no reason to put Nebula in this movie. It had villains, and even though she had more to do than Gamorra, rather put those two in a different movie. Also, the daddy issue thing - didn't we already go through this with Loki? Maybe they need to start a support group... The Collector scared me more than Thanos, and Thanos is supposed to be the big bad here. Yeah, missed the mark there. I need to see the Collector fleshhed out more, and I just know The Wasp is in his collection somewhere.

I saw this movie twice. The first time, with a group of Marvelites for the fun of it. I wore a flower shirt. Some people got the reference and freaked out. All of us had a fun time. The second time I saw this movie, it was only for Rocket Raccoon and Groot scenes. And Howard The Duck. So... Dear James, I only saw your movie a second time for the mo-cap characters. Got a little problem there. Rocket was awesome, I loved his little hands, the prostetic leg bit, etc etc. And Groot was interesting... A team-up one-shot with these guys would be good. James, you owe me twelve bucks. Even the Stan Lee cameo wasn't worth it - I actually didn't spot it untill the second time i saw the movie, mostly because I wasn't looking for it anymore.

Again, I don't feel this was essential viewing. This didn't tie together anything, it didn't set up anything, it was just a movie set in space...


Sequel Talk:
 - I don't think we need a GOTG2 next. Nope, Peter's searching for his father, but you kind of need Miss Marvel and Nova for that. James Gunn said he doesn't like Nova and that's why he wasn't in the first movie, so let someone else direct a movie set on Xandar. We need to see more of the Nova Corps, and obviously Rider. I guess some Kree/Thanos involvement is OK, because it is in space...
 - Peter Quill's backstory , Yondu, life as an outlaw... Eventual search for his dad can lead up to GOTG2
 - The Kree/Thanos/Gamorra/Nebula/Collector. All the creepy blue, green and white space people in one movie? Awesome
 - Should Iron Man be in Guardians of the Galaxy 2? I don't care, slap him in there. I've mentioned countless times before how much I don't like Iron Man, and I probably won't see the sequel so put him in there.